FoxFire Studios present:
Sailor Moon: American Kitsune
By David Gonterman
Note to Sonic the Hedgehog fans: This takes place outside
of Blood and Metal.
Power Rangers, VR Troopers, and Masked Rider by Saban
Sailor Moon brought to the US by Dic
David "Davey Crockett" Kintobor by David Gonterman
SAINT LOUIS: Six Power Rangers, three VR Troopers, and
the Masked Rider joined three members of the Youth United
Nations and a local St. Louisan who appears to be their
leader, while in between two ethnic factions who were just
about to riot in front of the Americas Center. The St.
Louisan is identified as David Kintobor, the one who shot
and killed the Piasa Monster just 12 hours ago.
"Behold the enemy: A world of one ethnicity hating
another since I don't care how long back. A world where
violence is answered by violence, and justice and equality
is decided by who's the worst in the bunch. It's a world
where *none* of you will survive, unless we stop it now and
here, even if we have to take out every last one--"
SAINT LOUIS: David Kintobor stands over Portwood [an
Afro-centrist history teacher who shot off David's left arm
shortly after he slain the Piasa Monster] and aims a rifle
straight down her. "Every part of the monster *you* want me
to become says I should blow your head off right here, but
the problem with that is that it would give you exactly what
you want. It might even get you off. And I can't have
that, can I?" Davey moved the rifle fifteen degrees to the
right and fired on empty concrete. "The way to beat your
bigotry down, is not to beat you up. Life's too short and
precious to waste it growing bitter over something that
hasn't happened to you personally. And obviously, unlike
you, I prefer a life where you don't have to answer to the
sins of the father. I figure, the perfect vengeance, is to
have that come to pass for this world.
But by the angered look on Portwood's face, she was
vowing that day to see that what David wants doesn't happen.
ST. LOUIS MAYOR'S OFFICE: The city of St. Louis has a
check for a million dollars and the keys to the city for
their newest hero, but David Kintobor has failed to show up
to collect his reward; until last night, where he sneaked
into the mayor's office and took the check, leaving the key
untouched and this note:
"You idiot. Why do you think I want to be your
superhero now, after the thanks you've given me?"
Those words were the headlines of the next day, and the
question on everybody's mind?
POWER RANGERS COMMAND CENTER:
Zordon: David is under a lot of stress recently, only
part of it is the political troubles with the Piasa
Incident. He was also suffering from Memory Compression,
where he spent a lifetime in an alternate dimension in the
space of eight hours. Dissolving this 'archive' over time,
can prove problematic to the human psyche.
Kimberly: And then there's the question why he's sent
here, instead of heaven. <Sighs> he must think he's in Hell.
Where's he now?
Zordon: In the Colorado Plains, where he can have some
peace and quiet to sort out what has happened to him. He
will also have an old friend to help him there. <Viewing
Globe On> He is Old Man Coyote, an Native American spirit
animal. Known for his trickery, but is very protective of a
small percentage of people that he calls 'his children,' of
which David is one."
Adam: <Looks at Coyote's records, including some of
his stories> Man, Fifty Million spirit guides, and Davey
gets the Q!
<The entire life you had on Mobius as a Fox is stored
in your head; "Archived," I believe you call it. Right now
it's trying to de-archive into your current memory. As it
does, you'll be *becoming* that fox, in body and in form.
You'll also have some extra powers included according to
your age, for according to legend, special foxes known to
the Japanese as Kitsune have the power to shape shift when
they hit 100 years of age, which is where you're at right
now. You'll also have some sort of 'Magical Power' I don't
know much about yet; I'll need more research. By the way,
you still have that Morpher Zordon tossed to you?>
-Yeah, but I'm afraid I don't know why I'm keeping it
though, Coyote. I'd figure it'd just be a cool belt
<You'll soon have a good reason>
Coyote took the Morpher and replaced the fox totem
coin, which was made of non-special clay, with a glowing
power coin with a similar fox head. The Morpher powered up.
<Zordon made this special power coin to make your
cyborg half morph with you when you shape shift. No sense
having your shoulder splinter or your skull burst open
because of your mechanical parts. And with this prototype
Morpher, It will do nicely.> Coyote slapped the Morpher on
top of Davey's belt, and it merged into the buckle in place.
<Keep this on you at all times.>
-Sure thing, Granddad. Nice to know that the floating
<Hey, you did all right back at St. Louis. So what if
half the people in the city wouldn't cared if that drop dead
skull-less Fred took over as they watched?>
-That's 'Zedd,' Old Man.-
<Whatever! The fact is . . . I know about you feeling
sorry about ending up back on this planet. You don't want
to bother anyone about this pity party you're having . . .
waaaaitaminute . . . what's that behind you? The moon.
It's getting bigger, or something. . .>
Davey turned around. -Holy $#!*! It's not getting
bigger! It's getting *Closer!!*-
<It's headed straight for us!! Run for it Davey!! The
sky is falling!! THE SKY IS FALLING!!>
Davey booked down the mountain and into the plains
below, but he tripped on a root and fell on his face as the
moon was crashing onto him.
-This vision sucks. . . Change it . . . -
Davey woke up with some hotter-than-hell salsa in his
mouth and someone calling his name. "David? David! You
At first he could only see a coyote with a scar across
his snout. He could barely remember his name. "K-Kickaha?"
The 'coyote's eyes opened wide when he heard that. But
as he did, Davey's eyes focused and the coyote became a
human, with that same scar on his face. "Davey! Davey
Crockett! It's *you* isn't it?"
As he said that name, David felt something in his right
hand. It was a baseball cap with a racoon tail. He put it
on his head and smiled.
"A-Ah can't believe it," David laughed with tears in
his eyes. Edward had the same. "It *is* you, isn't it,
Davey? It was real. It was all real."
As the two reunited friends ate more of the above
spicy-as-all-get-out stuff, they compared notes on the life
they lived on Mobius.
"Well," Davey said, "now Ah know why they call ya
'Edward Two Lives'."
"Er . . . Could you make it 'Edward Two *Thousand*
"Two Thousand? Come again?"
Edward told David how some Veteran Hospital doctor putz
took the lives of every Edward Becerra that existed in every
possible 'Alternate Universe'--Including Mobius--and crammed
them all into Edwards poor brain.
"Damn!! All those alternate Eddies in your brain?"
"No shit. <Speaks in a redneck accent David is known
for> Ah guess dere's a Edward in a dang mobile home park
round here sumwhare! <Points to head> Seriously, if Old
Man Coyote didn't put a mnemonic filter to slow the de-archiving
down somewhat . . ."
"Yeah, but *Two Hundred plus* archives? Ah only got
*one* and it's giving me crap!"
"I *know*! That's why I'm so damned JEALOUS AT
Edward got up to mock throttle David but to his
surprise, he found that his body did not protest as it used
to one bit. He noticed that his arms and back can move now
without pain. He got up and walked a few steps and only
detected a slight limp.
"Remember, Kickaha? I had your butt roboticized . . .
It's the cure for what ails ya!"
Ed was brought to his knees. "You did it to me again,
Old Man. I can't believe it."
Later that night, the two were standing outside under
the moonlight. David had something on his mind, but he
didn't know whatever or not to tell it to Edward. You see,
it was about his vision, and he doesn't know yet which ones
he's supposed to keep to himself and which ones to share.
But then Edward started talking. "Bright moon tonight. Big
too. It appears to be coming closer."
"Yeah. I had that feeling too."
The too looked at each other surprised. "The Vision."
"You had it too."
"Yeah. It seemed to be a warning or something."
"Zordon did say somethin' about me bein' an important
player in th' fight of Good and Evil. It just that . . ."
Just then, as his voice trails off. Davey's eyes
glowed red, as it often does when the built-in heads-up
display activates. His vision switches to a virtual reality
"Edward. I just got a Target Acquisition. Someone's
falling from the sky, and without a parachute!! Over
Edward found the plummeting person through some
binoculars. "Oh my god! You're right!!"
"We've gotta catch her before she goes splat on the
pavement!" Davey reached for his Morpher. "Power Suit
Activate! Command Jetpack Launch!!"
A flash of orange light, and Davey's clothing has
changed. He didn't look like a Power Ranger at all to
Edward. Davey was more dressed for Masters of the Maze.
Davey's power suit resembled a high-tech football uniform
minus the helmet. His left arm was changed to a robotic
limb with what looked like a laptop computer crammed into
it. There were other jealousy-inducing ultra-high-tech
things strapped to every limb on his body. "Who are you, my
next victim to my twit smashing club? One of the Zords?
That new UltraNinjaZord, I'd wager."
"How'd you know. Eddie?" Davey said as *wings* popped
out the back, and he took off after the damsel on distress.
"Hah! Who said chivalry ain't dead! Waitaminute!
How'd he know that it's a *girl* falling? This I've got to
see!" Edward reached for his car and followed. Thrilled to
see some action after being retired from the army. "Hmmm.
I'd wonder what color *I* would be? So help me, if I get
purple, I'll defect to Rita Repulsaa!"
Having an on-board biochip that can track falling women
and project their trajectory on top of Davey's HUD, he had
no trouble reaching an intercept course with the
Unidentified Falling Babe. He got up under her, signaled a
fair catch, and allowed her to land into his arms like the
opening kickoff at the Super Bowl.
His eyes widened when he recognized *who* he just
caught. So did Edward, when Davey swooped back to the
ground, de-morphed back to his 'civilian' clothes, and
settled his catch onto the ground safely. "I'll be damned.
Old Man Coyote was on the money! The moon *did* fall on top
"Yeah. A *Sailor* Moon."
The two stared at the blond Japanese schoolgirl that
either of them recognized in their Anime studies. She's
supposed to be a leader of a group like the Power Rangers in
Japan, but she has the odious difficulty of being the
Japanese version of an air head. Her Power Suit resembles
the 'Sailor Suits' schoolgirls like her wear, but here, it
has torn into tatters, barely hiding the naughty parts of
her body. She was bruised and beaten up, to the point that
Davey and Edward wanted to find the dork responsible and
commit a ritual mutilation. Her hair, in her distinctive
rabbit ear ponytails, have seen better days.
Davey brushed the blond hair out of her eyes. "You
aright, ma'am," hoping that she would recognize what he just
said as friendly, even if it *was* in a language she would
Her eyes fluttered open, and saw the man who supposedly
saved her from becoming street pizza. She didn't recognized
him. He looked American, kinda cute, and he was speaking in
English, a language she hasn't grasped yet, and in a heavy
accent that she heard about only in rumor. She struggled to
speak. "k-k-konichi wa-a-a-a . . . n-no speak redneck . .
." Then she fainted in his arms.
David and Edward looked at each other. "I think we
should take her inside." "Yeah."
David carried the fallen Sailor Moon into the car and
took her back to Edward's home.
To Be Continued...